I’m with everything you just said.

My mother was a hoarder, but not food garbage. And we didn’t have vermin or roaches. She mostly shoved papers in unlabeled plastic bags and piled them up for years then wouldn’t get rid of them: “Because I need to go through my papers!” And the accumulated dust.

I would be embarassed for friends to come over, but teenage boys…no way in hell would she let that happen.

She had a temper.

I don’t see that yet, in his mom’s behavior. She seems quite docile, placating.