Apologies if this isn’t allowed, it’s more of a rant. Just wondering how everyone deals with the whole family asking for free photos thing.
For context, I’m a professional fashion/commercial photographer so family portraits aren’t going to help my portfolio or anything. My schedule is incredibly busy year round, even more so during the holidays, and I’m also a mother of two young kids. So if I’m not in parent mode, I’m working- often until midnight, and then I’m awake around 5:30 with the kids. I know it sounds like I’m complaining and… well, I kind of am, but want to give an accurate picture of how little time I have available to be doing free photos.
So every year, my in-laws want a family session. Not just a quick snap but like a full session. And every year I do it because they’re my in-laws and I don’t want them to think badly of me. The one time I hinted at being annoyed at this yearly request they were flabbergasted, saying “I thought you liked photography? It doesn’t take much time, does it?” This year I feel like I might snap. I’ve been racing to meet deadlines for huge clients that I’ve worked hard to get and I keep getting sidetracked with all of these family shoots (it is also happening with friends, other relatives). It’s not just the shoot- it’s deciding a location, responding to lengthy texts about what to wear, doing the editing- you guys know. It’s never “just a few pics”.
How can I deal with this?! Do I need to just suck it up and be a nicer person? I’m just burnt out af. Help.
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What your in-laws do for a living? Tell them to do it for free for you. That will settle the matter.
I have a photographer friend helping me out, I pay him with a big discount he offers me and I help him build websites, which is a huge bonus for him seeing my work products are more expensive than his on the market.
So if they weren’t willing to pay you, trade for something else.
Tell them you don’t have time for real and put whatever reason that you prefer. If you do it few times, they will get the hint.
No need for ugly bill to sent to family and such. That’s just awkward.
If I can’t take a few photos for a family member or a friend, please put me down, I trust that in your case you never ask your mechanic friend for help, never call on your brother to help you move house, or do you just not have any friends?
You cannot just say an outright NO, since they’re still family, you have to offer explanation. Here are some options. Adjust accordingly to your situation.
“I’m sorry I cannot do it this time, you know, I’m really drained and burnt out lately.”
“Most I can do is a quick snap of everyone together, something that doesn’t feel like work this time.”
“I’d love to, but my dates are fully booked, the other free dates are when I spend time to edit. Would you prefer a schedule 3 months from now?”
“I’m sorry I cannot do our lovely portraits this time, would you like me to recommend to you a friend who can do it? I’m helping out my colleague by giving him some extra projects, but please prepare a nice talent fee also.”
These will take some practice to say, but if you truly value your time and energy, these will come out genuine.