I’m looking for a very simple ticketing app to self host, first to put in use my new small home lab. My family often has me as the IT guy and want a lot of stuff from me so I’d like to host a simple ticketing system such as uvdesk or glpi, self hostel, lightweight and preferably dockerised.
Do anyone knows if something like that exist ? or is uvdesk the most simple ticketing app out there ?
Hahahahah, I’m sorry son, what’s your ticket number? SHeeewwwwwaaahhh yeahhhh I’m going to need a ticket number. You’re welcome to open one by emailing helpdesk@thesmithfamily.net and we’ll get with you just as soon as we can in the order received. Just know, our agreed SLA is between 4 and 8 business hours, depending on your grades this week.
“I understand sir, and I’m sorry to hear your WiFi is slow, I can absolutely help you with that. To get started, I’ll need your ticket number, 4-digit access PIN, and most recent math test.
Oh, I see here you earned a ‘C’, that only entitles you to 200Kbps down. If you are interested in our 1Mbps service we need proof of a ‘B’ - or if you would like to submit an ‘A’ we can offer our gold-tier 500Mbps service, and if you would like to take advantage of that offer during this marking period I can add in complementary 5ms ping SLA as well. Also your mother has told you three times to take the trash out, Anthony.”