You may recall Zeno’s Dichotomy Paradox from High School math, but I will summarize here to set the table. Zeno states that to get from point A to point B an object must travel half way there, and to get half way, you must first reach a quarter of the distance and so on. The concept being that there is an infinite number of points between a destination and the starting point such that an object cannot traverse an infinite number of points in a finite time.

In football terms a player can simply cross the goal line if they have possession of the ball in open play. Like clockwork the eagles get to the one or two yard line and tush push their way to six. Once the ball is snapped the paradox has no value, but before the snap the ball placement is subject to the ref’s placement and within the 5 yard line the best the ref can do is half the distance to the goal. Therefore no matter how many times there is a penalty, the ref cannot place the ball in the end zone. The football can only ever approach the end zone this way.

The idea then is to blow up the play by jumping offside and tackling Hurts before they have a chance to snap. How many times? However many you want! You can do it forever. Grind the game to a halt, an endless time loop of unwatchable garbage. You hope that they either false start and push themselves back or get bored and change the play, but you don’t let them do what they want to do. You filibuster the entire football game until you get the outcome you’re looking for. You can even call the strategy a Philly buster.

It’s a stupid idea but I’d like to see someone try it. It might as well be the niners