• tux7350@lemmy.world
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    3 months ago

    Well thanks for getting my hopes up. I went into the profile looking for penis and all I got was cat pics D:<

    • theangryseal@lemmy.world
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      3 months ago

      You wouldn’t want to see an angry seal penis anyway. Or maybe you would? You dodged a bullet. Or maybe you didn’t?

      I have the most typical penis. Nothing special. I’ll describe it if you want. Just your average everyday penis. Now you’re curious. I’m sorry.

      I’ll describe it.

      Tip like a mushroom, shaft like a stem. Balls where the mycelium would normally be, but not buried. Just hanging out above ground. Mostly black hair, a few grays scattered in. A few inches from an asshole with a prominent hemorrhoid scar. Mostly soft, but occasionally not so soft. Has produced more offspring than is typical. Vasectomy incoming.

      Hope that helps.