Cop: do you know why I pulled you over?

Me: fuck. Is it because I’m ugly as fuck? Third time this month.

gets shot for not complying

I once saw this image/story being narrated by an over the top German guy, in some Facebook or tik tok or insta video, and found it hilarious, then I tried to find the damn video again for hours with no success, so now it just makes me sad. NoOOo Paunlinchen!

The picture made me assume anon was a girl, so I was thinking that if you, a girl, hear another girl say she wants a man, and you offer your womanly services, it shouldn’t come as a big shock to be rejected and laughed out of the room… Then I read the comments and thought “oh. Yeah. That makes more sense.”

Assumptions ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ

Can’t afford the kids or the printers?

How’d you sell the same phone 4 times? Did you tie a string to it and pulled it back after the transaction was done??