Howdy children. Gather round to grandpas campfire to hear the story of what playing Vel’Koz was like long ago. Vel’koz was released in February of 2014. Wow! Almost 10 years ago. At that time it was clearly known that distance mages were countered by high mobility champions. Let me list the ones you had to watch out for.

Kassadin, Nocturne, Riven, Fizz, Ahri, Zed, Zac, Vi, Lee Sin.

That’s it. Those were your high mobility champions.

• Kassadin could be countered early with good lane play.
• Nocturne had to ult you directly.
• Riven was almost never mid.
• Fizz was a nightmare as well as Ahri and Zed
• Zac, vi, and lee you just ward against.

Welcome back to 2023. Riot has decided that super high mobility assassin brusiers are pretty cool. Isn’t it super fun that you can come through jungle terrain and off-paths. Kayn sure is exciting. The counter play for Vel includes… uhhh… gotta sit further back. They reworked Sion and added Kled so that you could get insta run down. Added Ornn and changed Mao ult so that it could knife you from long range with hard CC. Sylas came around and does whatever he does to you. Aurelion Sol can dive you from across your screen. Ekko? Best of luck, sir. Lillia now has 550 ms while dodging your slow skill shots. Akshan dives at you. Vex hits you with a nearly global ult. Naafiri? Ha. Good luck, man.

The problem fundamentally is not Vel’Koz. It’s riot’s obsession with absurd mobility and spell kits that can hit you across your screen. Big CC wave coming right at you? Didn’t exist back then. Assassin divebombing you from across the screen? That was Zed or Kassadin only. Jungler crossing your screen in a second? Didn’t exist. If it did, it was Lee Sin and you had to hit multiple difficult skill shots to do it.

You guys just don’t remember that immobile mages used to have a place. They do not have a place in modern League. It’s frustrating and it’s bad balancing.