Basically the title. I hear a lot of talk about how Faker’s worlds 2023 skin should be legendary and how he should get his own champion.

100%, to the moon. Make it four skins for each of his trophies, and throw in another champion just because. It’ll sell to the high heavens, they all will.

But we can do much better. I need a more authentic, dense, engaging Faker experience.

I don’t just want to play league of legends as Faker’s champion and using Faker’s skin, I want the whole Faker experience. I want to be IN his skin.

I want a Faker body pillow. I want an IV drip of Faker flavoured nutrients to sustain me through 12+ hour league binges, and I need this shit to be nutritionally ENHANCED because the second monitor will be playing a running repeat of every world’s finals appearance by Faker from the past decade. Make that THREE monitors for the Faker multitasking experience. I will have Faker scented candles burning incense on my three foot wide Faker altar above the array of monitors.

My diet will be raw brocolli. My religion, a leather bound copy of Faker quotes; my exercise, 100 ground rolls while I envision dodging champion abilities. My hunger to experience Faker is so complete that if I could wear a Faker skinsuit (fake, PETA don’t misunderstand), I would.

But one thing is missing. League of legends is run by Riot Games. Riot Games is not Faker. Therefore, it can be better. What the fuck is League of legends? Let’s make Faker CEO of Riot games Faker and rename League of legends to simply “Faker”.

Then we can realize our ultimate dream of experiencing Faker physically and spiritually while we play as Faker’s champion using Faker’s skin, in Faker’s game, Faker, made by Faker, run by Faker.

I need this tomorrow. Thanks Riot Faker

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