I love Japan so much. It is my happy place and I feel so aligned with so much of it- the peace, orderliness, respect. But the culture of objectificying women is a dealbreaker, which breaks my heart but I can’t give that one up. So, I’d go with Korea.

I love Japan so much. It is my happy place and I feel so aligned with so much of it- the peace, orderliness, respect. However the systemic objectification of women is a dealbreaker. So, I’d go with Korea.

In order of preference:

1. Somewhere where I know the local language
2. If that’s not possible, somewhere where English is commonly understood
3. Somewhere that’s reasonably safe
4. Somewhere with job opportunities in my field
5. Everything else

Singapore is economically extremely competitive, highly developed, safe, English is pretty well understood, but it’s entirely urbanized and there’s no “lonely beaches” where you can live an isolated beachbum / island lifestyle.

Thailand is still pretty decent in terms of safety for Southeast Asia, but has some political instability that comes up semi-regularly, English will work… soooometimes, and I’m sure there’s decent private healthcare if you can pay for it, but it isn’t economically competitive with Singapore… unless maybe you’re in downtown Bangkok, but there’s no beaches in downtown Bangkok.

If your husband’s family are scattered around Asia, chances are he speaks an Asian language? If that’s the case go somewhere where at least one of you can speak the language fluently. There’s no point in moving to a beach with no job, no services, no social life, and where you can’t talk to anybody.

And think of it this way, whether you’re in Singapore or Bangkok - you’re in Southeast Asia, a bunch of lovely beaches are within like a one hour flight or an overnight bus ride. Maybe you won’t live on the beach, but services and infrastructure just tend to be better in the urban centres.