• indomara@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    What an odd take.

    10 years for the children to be able to fend for themselves? Assuming you are married before the first pregnancy, then have a full term birth at 40 weeks, then wait 12 months before the second birth that would put the first child around … 8 when this hypothetical “ideal” marriage dissolved, and subsequent children even younger.

    Which wouldn’t make sense at all from an evolutionary standpoint, finding another man to step in as a father is not easy, so much so that there were laws around the care of widows in most societies.

    The average marriage duration is only 7 years? Seems its nearly double that here in Australia. I also have two 18 year olds living at home who say they desperately want independence but also don’t want to get a job or do dishes, and have the sexual maturity of a potato.

    I don’t think we are “meant to” have any particular relationship type or length, humans are far too diverse for that.

    Edit: Some interesting replies, notably both touch on the concept of “it takes a village” which I agree is something we have sadly lost in most of Western society. I however do not think it is a stand in for long term family units. Instead I think a “village” type of setup takes the pressure off parents and allows for a stronger partnership. The countries with longest marriages are all either countries with multi-generational housing as the norm, or with higher incomes per capita.

    • meowMix2525@lemm.ee
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      4 months ago

      I think you’re confusing human/evolutionary nature with things that are a product of our, very recent, hyper-individualist societies. You ever heard the phrase, “it takes a village”? Early humans, heck even 50 years ago humans, lived much more communally than we do today. Especially if you read about native american societies.

      It’s reasonable that a child could rely less on the parents in their home being in any specific arrangement if there is a robust and wholesome community/found family for them to fall back on, which teaches them how to be a productive member and compels them to do so. Look at boys and girls clubs of america, as just one very modern example.

      I don’t think we are “meant to” have any particular relationship type or length, humans are far too diverse for that.

      I concur.