A horse? Seriously? No way can this guy win against a horse. Have you seen horses? They’re huge.
Fast too! And have you counted the legs?? DOUBLE the number, I shit you not!
Thank you for not shitting me, that sounds more unpleasant than fighting a horse…
Idunno, some people pay good money for that sort of thing 🤷
Fighting horses right?
That too.
No arms though.
When people say stuff like this, I assume they never lived much outside of cities, and never had much contact with animals, besides pets. Seriously, a horse? Even smaller animals can be a challenge. Most animals are stronger and/or faster than us, and have fangs, claws, etc.
I mean I or you certainly couldn’t get it in PvP. But if you can scare it enough so it starts to run, a human (of old times) would win.
If you have trail finding/following skills, you can literally chase it to exhaustion. Humans have one of the best stamina in the animal kingdom. We used to chase animals until they just couldn’t move further. Apart from hunting in groups, that was our thing.
Stamina and intelligence, our standing out traits in nature.
Don’t forget throwing. Human wrists are so agile and delicate because they need to be for us to throw things as well as we can.
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But if can’t put up a good fight, I’d feel too guilty to hurt it. For me it’s gotta be something I have a good chance against but that isn’t just utterly defenseless lol
A horse is just an intense will to die on four legs. You can defeat a horse by feeding it after it runs around for a little while.
Prep time. I choose to use that prep time to install a cattlegrate. I am now basically guaranteed the win.
Or, i bring along poisoned grain and something to hide in/out of the horses reach.
Ponies are horses too.
Yeah but they also have powerful magic
Friendship magic, by far the most powerful kind.
Yeah but if you have prep time, you can make a massive spear and thrower (I forget what those are called), an able bodied man could probably take a horse with one of those.
Do you mean atlatl?
Yes, exactly
Javelin?
I don’t know anyone (who is not already a professional in this) who could make a spear in an hour. Best most would do was to get a couple of injuries while trying to make a spear.
There was no time limit set, with an hour, yeah, no chance unless you do this regularly.
With enough prep time, you can purchase a shotgun. More than half a pound of lead pellets will bring a horse down if it’s delivered at the typical velocity.
That relies on somebody elses prep time, so, I don’t think that would count.
Note, they are actually much larger than the average silicon version of it. The largest I could find was 43 cm long, which is OK to take. But normally, they’re ~1 m when e… oh wait, you mean “take” as in “win against”, nvm.
I used to work with horses. They may be larger than the average silicon version, but if you can find it, there once was a picture of a yellow gel one (Thor Jr., I think) with a forearm and fist right next to it to compare it to, and that one should have been placed next to a real one.
I actually made a weird ass squeek laugh sound passing that 43cm mark…it was a response of recognition xD
Not sure who these foolishly brave Americans are who think they can beat an elephant and a grizzly bear bare handed.
Or even a kangaroo, those things can be scary af. Forget about anything bigger.
I think your best bet fighting a Kangaroo would be to work it from the sides, Kangaroos can’t jump backwards and usually punch or grapple and kick forwards. If you consider it like a southpaw fighting an orthodox boxer, they would have their lead foot on the outside of the orthodox fighters, making the orthodox constantly having to turn towards them while they work from the side and continue pivoting keeping an advantage on their opponent.
Maybe a grizzly bear when you poke him in the eye just right? But an elephant… You’ve got nothing
By the time you poke his eyes, the grizzly poke your stomach out of your belly
I really want to know what they think they’d be doing to the eagle.
The amount of people who don’t think they can beat a rat is concerning
Rats are fast though. Would depend, do I get time to set traps? Bait? Do I get a net or other weapons.
You drop a normal guy in an area with a rat, , with no tools, weapons etc. you’d see him chase the fucker around for an hour before he gives up.
It says “if you are unarmed” so for sure no baits or traps. I’m assuming that it also doesn’t consider the possibility of the rat running away.
You’re in a circular, smooth arena with a rat. That’s it.
Welcome to the cheesedome!
Yeah, and it’s even higher than it appears at first cause the scale only goes up to 80%. So >30% of responders don’t think they can beat a rat in a fight.
Let me try, let me try:
Lemmings, would you rather fight 100 duck sized horses or 1 horse sized duck?
The tiny 1ft -ish extinct Dawn-Horse was a real thing. PBS documentary modeled it as skittish, jumpy, fast, tough enough to drag and push logs. Catch a couple of those and you got youself a pair of 30mph roller skates.
🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎1 horse-sized duck, male, that’s in the mood… Ever witness firemen tackle a charged firehose that broke loose and is whipping around… amorously. Now put a Clydesdale at the end of that. You may be chance lucky enough to distract it with bread, but can really only fight it from space.
🦆
Catch a couple of those and you got youself a pair of 30mph roller skates. 🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎🐎
Taking notes here for some… new projects.
Obviously the duck-sized horses, that’s not even a fight. What amounts to pretty much a t-rex, on the other hand…
Nah, ducks have hollow bones, making them pretty crap in physical combat against creatures that don’t. As long as you can avoid the beak, you should be fine.
Duck-sized horses, on the other hand, would still be faster and stronger than humans even if it’s scaled 1:1 relative to horse size vs duck size and there’s a hundred of them! You’d be swarmed in no time!
But they would still have instinctual skittishness, and they just got exponentially smaller then the thing they are facing.
Nah, they would be out for blood in this scenario, otherwise the premise of fighting them wouldn’t make any sense. The bigger problem for the tiny horses is their inability to reach the upper parts of your body. Sure, they probably have a mean bite, but because of their size and the shape of their teeth they most likely won’t be able to enclose your leg. A horse bite crushes, so keep your fingers away and you are most likely fine.
They also have hooves, so no scratching and climbing. Horses hooves are dangerous because they have a massive horse behind it when it comes flying towards you. Take that away and they could be baby fist for all you should care.
If you look at their jumping capabilities, yea they ar impressive for an animal of their size, but once you are 30cm tall it’s much less impressive to jump as high as you are tall (and horses really don’t jump all that high, most of it comes from tucking their legs).
If you compare the tiny horse to a cat, the cat would be much more dangerous, because it has claws, sharp teeth and can reach your face. As long as you wear heavy boots and have a good stomping/kicking technique you should be fine versus duck sized horses.
Do I get tools? If so, the horse sized duck. If not, 100 duck sized horses.
Yeah, but the horse sized duck gets tools too.
Then no
The tool of a horse sized duck would be terrifying.
I’d like to see the horse use an rpg
Bring on the horde of duck-sized horses!
On Lemmy, it’s the celebrities who asks lemmings the dumb questions!
100 duck sized horses, and it’s not even close.
Ignoring venom and poison, the most dangerous animal a human could realistically win against would be a wolf. That doesn’t mean I could win against a wolf, but some humans can and have.
IDK. People have wrestled bears.
There was that one guy that choked a bear to death with the bloody stump of his wrist after the bear bit his hand off, so I’d say that counts as a technical win.
Wait, choked as in strangled or as in shoved his arm down its throat?
The latter 💪
We take those. - Every living creature ever.
I thought that was Roosevelt’s buddy and a mountain lion.
Don’t threaten us with a good time 😉
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(https://lemmy.world/pictrs/image/6084564c-3486-42fe-85c7-c7bce387c759.jpeg) Have you seen how big wolves are? Most people can’t take on a pit bull, wolves are literal predators.
We should be talking about the average person being able to win >50% of the time, not the ideal human who wins on an off-chance.
Personally, I’m guessing I’d be somewhere in the range of a medium sized calf
Calf is a good ballpark. I think I could take a whitetail doe but not a buck, and that’s about the same range.
It’s easy, you just put your fist out so the wolf bites down on it. Then you simply shove your whole arm down its throat.
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Chimpanzees are on the same level I think. Although I’d rather fight a chimpanzee than a wolf.
You stand absolutely no chance against a chimp in unarmed combat. They’ve literally ripped people’s faces off.
Unprepared people. Chimps aren’t stronger than humans.
Chimps are significantly stronger than humans. https://www.bbc.com/news/science-environment-40405026
This is a per muscle size comparison. Chimps are also significantly smaller than humans.
Chimps get up to 5ft tall and can have an 8 foot wingspan.
Humans get up to 2 m (6,75 feet) tall, of course there are even taller people but this is still a healthy size. Also chimps weigh like 70 kg max while a human can be healthy weigh more than 90 kg. The question is if we get a matched opponent in terms of strength and body weight relative to their own species.
You’re right, I didn’t think about your intense face strengthening regime you will be conducting in preparation for this.
I’d much rather go up against a wolf than a chimpanzee. Chimps are crazy strong, bite, and have hands to grasp and tear with
Plus they’re smart and dextrous enough to use tools!
They also love ripping off people’s genitals, faces etc…
And they have lots of hands.
Chimpanzees get up to five feet tall and have up to an 8 foot wingspan. The average human female is 5’4 “and males average 5’9” with a proportional wingspan. Chimps have a very high amount of fast twitch muscle fibers which are significantly stronger than the slow twitch muscle fibers that make up the majority of human muscles.
Chimps have extremely long arms with way more lean muscle mass. And that muscle mass is 50% stronger than a human’s, making chimps 3-4 times stronger than the average human. It has massive incisors with a bite force of *** 1300 psi (8900 kPa}***. That’s more than a grizzly bear’s 950 psi.
You have a fighting chance against a wolf. You have zero chance unarmed against a full grown chimp. It will literally rip you apart with ease.
Extra scary fact: Chimps try to bite your face off in a fight.
Yes, you’d be without a nose and eyes within seconds. Good luck for the rest of the fight.
You use average for humans and up to for chimps? Also body weight is a far better comparison and a strong and large human can weigh at least 1.5 times more than a chimp so the strength difference isn’t great if at all present.
You’re the person that dies first in a horror movie because you’re too stubborn to listen to actual facts presented to you. Chimps are absolute killing machines. I don’t care if you’re 6 foot 6 and 250 pounds of pure muscle - you will not win a fight against a fully grown chimpanzee. They have two 1+ inch fangs and a bite force of 1300psi. That’s enough to bite clean through most any bone in your body. Male chimps reach about 150 or so pounds, but can get larger.
This is what happens when a chimp attacks a human:
The emergency crew described Nash’s injuries as “horrendous”.[19] Within the following 72 hours, Nash underwent more than seven hours of surgery on her face and hands by four teams of surgeons. The hospital provided counseling to its staff members who initially treated her because of the extraordinary nature of Nash’s wounds.[27] Paramedics noted she had lost 9 fingers, nose, eyes, lips, and mid-face bone structure and received significant brain tissue injuries.[28] Doctors removed chimpanzee hair and teeth that had been implanted into her bones and reattached her jaw…
Have fun getting your face ripped off because you were scared of the big proto-doggie, I guess 🤷
Do I get to use vehicles?
Yea, but the horse gets it too.
If that’s an option, might as well allow guns and then humans win every time.
I’m not convinced I could take an octopus armed with guns, and regular hunting dogs kill their owners that way every year
Yeah punch a horse in the face, see how many broken bones you have if you live lol
That being said, the post is accurate, although took me less than an hour to reply
That killed 35 minutes
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I have no idea what “tap the tatami in a whisper” means, but it sounds uncomfortably sexual 😬
Only if you do it right
Are horse legs actually fragile, or does it take a lot of effort to break one?
If fragile, I think people are overcomplicating this. You’ll probably get fucked up in the process, but once the horse is crippled your grim deed is done. If they’re not fragile and you’ll need to seriously wrassle them down to exert enough force, you’re almost certainly dead.
Uh, no. And one kick can kill you
Horses can kick forwards, backwards and sideways. They can rear up to about 12 ft tall and stomp your head.
Plus they weigh about 1200-1600 lbs, although percherons weigh much more.
Does my prep time involve sourcing weapons? I think a sledgehammer would do the trick if I can hide out at the fight zone prior to the horse arriving then sneak attack.
But the horse gets prep time too
But the horse can’t pull a trigger.
Or can it?
TUN DUN DUUUUUUUUN!
What is it going to get a sledgehammer too?
You really have spent no time around horses have you?
Or sledgehammers. Or sneak attacks. 😂
Well stay clear and you’ll be fine. Both horses and sledge hammers are sneaky enough as it is.
Are you sure sledge hammers are the things you’re thinking of? The big heavy things used to smash stuff? 😂
Blooming thing snuck up on my back muscles that’s for sure!
Yeah… If I’m honest, the time I’ve spent around horses is 0. I’ve spent a good chunk of time around sledgehammers though if that helps.
Maybe I’ll just kick a pug as hard as I can instead, I reckon I could win that one.
You mean like, fighting a horse by punching it? No that fucker gonna kill you. You might win if you have a spear and you know how to use it. But if it gets to you with it’s hooves you’ve lost.
Now if you can convince the horse you’re a lot scarier than you are, it might do what you want it to.
Now if you can convince the horse you’re a lot scarier than you are, it might do what you want it to.
Only reason why they don’t kill us on sight after all we’ve put them through: for all their amazing physical prowess, they’re also easily spooked idiots 😂
You can literally put a plastic bag on a stick and shake it at them and they will go wherever you want. Cuz it’s spooky, but not all that spooky. It’s like shaking that thing means you’re the master of the spooky stick.
All a horse has to do is pinch you with it’s teeth, then all your skin can come off.
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Thank you for this enlightening and horrifying imagery. I will keep it in mind the next time I’m near a horse.
You’re most welcome. It always stuck with me because as a child I had a horsey friend whose mother had a massive skin graft on one arm where a horse had tried to remove her jumper. Every time I see one of those vids of a feral stallion just tossing a foal in the air with it’s teeth it reminds me of it :( I love horses too, but yup they are very powerful animals.
I could absolutely take any animal that’s vegan and smaller than a cat. Maybe even a bunny. But a cat would eat my soul.
Bunnies are vicious. They bite and scratch.
Yes, I’ve seen the documentary:
I was thinking more-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTsEjj5AEp0
And the book was based on extensive research.
This always depends on how willing/aggregated the animal is. I’m fairly certain I could scare away a bear under the right conditions, but obviously not fight it.
People have survived bear attacks but I’m not sure I’d call that “winning”.
Well I’d call that “taking it in a fight”
Any animal less that half of my size, so no more that 30 kilos, then depends if that animal have special skills, like poison, but still he gonna die with me.
Poison won’t be a problem, you just have to be careful not to bite or lick the animal too much. Venom, on the other hand… 😛
Is it truly a victory if you don’t drink the blood of your vanquished foes?
Honey badger. You need a makeshift axe or hammer, minimum, to damage them. They have claws, and you’re in a coliseum with nothing but sand and sheer stone walls
We have claws too and teeths, I will bite his head off, rip his belly with my hand. Sure the honey badger will take maybe half of my face off, an eye, maybe even one of my hand, but I say I will win at last.
Their skin is so thick, lions struggle to draw blood. If they lose to a lion, the lion often just gives up after a They’re impact resistant, and their thick hides are way beyond human ability to bite through. Plus their aggression… They will not stop until they lose consciousness, then they’ll get back up and limp back for revenge
Basically the only ways for an unarmed human to kill one is to smash the skull (they’re concussion resistant btw, you’d probably need several hard hits), strangle them, or go in through the back door until you can get up to something important
I think it’s possible to win if you just rush on and commit, accepting you’ll probably lose an arm, but only possible… They have sharp claws and fast enough reactions to take on lions and cobras
That is super interesting, I know so little about the honey badger, still I feared most a lion because his mass, because vs that I am sure to die. A little enemy like the honey badger give me more hope, going through the asshole is actually a good idea, strangle and compress his skull for sure.
what about a honey badger or a pitbull? But they have a gun
Why did you give them a gun? Challenging fight with both btw, without guns, maybe I will lose one eye or something, but I will fight for win.
Most poison animals aren’t dangerous enough to humans that you couldn’t kill them and then get treatment.
You would get mauled and your eyes scratched out.
